Ten Things Stressed People Say
from 'my job is a joke' by matt silverman'


1) Okay, okay. I take it back. Unscrew you!

2) This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.

3) Do they ever shut up on your planet?

4) You look like crap. Is that the new style now?

5) I'm not crazy. I've been in a bad mood for thirty years.

6) I have to work 45 hours a week to be this poor.

7) I'm not tense, I'm just terribly alert.

8) Chaos, panic, and disorder... my work here is done.

9) Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't gone to sleep yet.

10) Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.